I have to be straight up with you and anyone else who visits.
My line of work in ministry doesn't allow me to have such a public profile with my full name. So there will definitely be some mystery as to who I really am because I can't share my name and where I work. However, a couple of my readers will know who I am personally because they either know me and live life with me or knew me before I had to incognito. :0)
However, I can tell you my name is Veronica and I'm 30 years old. That's pretty much as far as I'll probably go on this blog regarding my identification. It's annoying to me, because I once had a very public and popular blog back in the Xanga/Blogger/WordPress emerging days.
But security is important not only for my sake but the sake of those I serve in countries around the world. :0) It's crazy that this is the kind of world we live in!
What else can I tell you?
I grew up overweight my entire life. I'm the middle child in five beautiful/handsome THIN and fit siblings and the daughter of two very beautiful, thin and fit people.
Why I came out different is somewhat but not really a mystery. Marred by premature birth and all sorts of ailments and lack of chemicals (according to tests run half my life), I've never had a very speedy metabolism. I struggle with losing weight and hardly sweat when I work out.
However, if truth be told: I'm addicted to food and have long used it as a medication for loneliness, sadness, frustration as well as a celebration when in joy, victory, relationship-building, etc.
The older I get, the more I step out of denial.
The more blogs I read of amazingly honest people, the more I realize that not only am I in denial, but I don't have to be the exception.
I don't have to be the exception to an entirely thin family.
I also don't have to be the exception of all the people who can and are losing weight.
I CAN BE HEALTHY.
I CAN LOSE WEIGHT.
I CAN.
I've teetered most of my 20's between 220 and 250.
I am currently weighing in at 244. Last month I weighed 232.
I've not been under 230 for about four years.
I've struggled with getting below that number for different reasons... the compliments and attention of others frightens me... and self sabotaging takes it's course quicker than I can get on a scale.
I want it to be different now. I've ready so many testimonies of people of faith like me and people who don't consider themselves believers in Christ.... but each of them is a testimony; and each of them has inspired me. God has used them.
So here I am... And I hope you'll be my blog-friend and join me on this journey. I'll probably post pics here and there and will try to be as real as I can be without jeopardizing the safety of those I serve.
I'm so looking forward to blogging again about life and this journey to lose all this weight and find the REAL ME inside that the rest of the world doesn't take time to notice underneath all the layers of fat.
Some shout outs to some of my favorite bloggers whom I have followed for a VERY long time:
DEB!!! - My friend and sister in Christ; a gift from God and fellow traveler on this journey to THIN and FREEDOM! :0)
KENZ!!! - YOU ARE SIMPLY AMAZING AND I HAVE LONG FOLLOWED YOU AND PRAYED FOR YOU! I'm so excited about this new journey you are on with Sean!
Sean! - I've followed this amazing, honest and HERO of a man for a VERY long time now. I'm in awe of what he's done and God has given me much courage through Sean's journey!
OKAY, SO I'm not a person who cusses, but I have no choice here:
B**** CAKES, YOU ROCK! :0) She's a fellow Weight Watchers girl and I love this gal.
FIXING MYSELF THINNER: Just look at the picture and enough said. She's amazing!
Goodness, I could go on with about 10 others that I follow faithfully, like
PriorFatGirl
TJ's Test Kitchen
The Big Girl Blog
Succeeding... Doing it For Me
Roni's Weigh
MizFitOnline
Jack Sh*t, Getting Fit
Fit to the Finish
and so many others...
Okay, I better get going and start commenting on some of these to let them know I'm out here.
Blessings
and losing the weight,
Veronica
******
I recently moved and have been looking for a church home. I visited a church this last weekend that I really liked and am thinking I will explore it some more.
There was a familiar verse the pastor used in the message that spoke wonders to me in the area of my weight-loss... almost as if though God was there whispering, "Let's do this.... You can do it. With me, you can do it!"
"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down..." Hebrews 12:1
:D Wahoo, you! So glad you're back. I missed you. :D
ReplyDeleteThat Scripture verse is very meaningful to me. too long to explain. One translation refers to those "things that so easily entangle you and trip you up" I had a dream about vines curling around my ankles and pulling me down--and was given Hebrews 12 in that dream! Long before that particular "vine" translation was written. :)
I often think about my eating when I read that verse, although there is much more to it.
Re: sweat! You know, I was just saying the other day, that I do not perspire. Even in the hottest weather. Like this evening it was only 85 degrees, but it is MUGGY!!! I walked 3 miles. I was a teensy bit sticky. That's it.
I wonder if there's a gluten connection. ?
So glad you have a blog!!!
Deb
"For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control." -2 Timothy 1:7
ReplyDeleteHi Veronica! I found you from Sean's blog. You're very brave to reach out even if you can't reveal yourself. Stay strong and I believe you will succeed! :) ~H.
http://wanderingchaosinorder.blogspot.com/
hi im kelli sean's aunt and yes he is pretty amazing, but i think you will be just as amazing along your journey..it is a jouney and sometimes its hard and other times its a walk in the park ..hehe but we keep going and we will make it..good luck on your journey and i will be following you along your way..
ReplyDeletemine is snoconegirl.blogspot.com
kelli
Hi Veronica! I slipped here from Debs blog and want to say Hello! I love that scripture you quoted from Hebrews. I use a lot of scripture verses to help me too! You sound like a strong woman determined to make the best of your life. I think we're all in that same boat. Best of luck on your journey... I am a now a follower and here to support and encourage. :)
ReplyDelete~Margene
Wow!! I had no idea you all had left comments on here. I must have not checked the notification box and need to fix that. :0) I decided to check the blog/update right before I left the missions office today and am so glad I did!
ReplyDeleteDeb, how fitting that you were my first comment! :0) You're such an inspiration to me and I'm grateful to you for so many reasons; many which you know and others which you will get to know as I blog some more and reference you and your blog. :0)
Heather, what a timely verse you shared with me. You know, I've had to quote that verse many times in my life because of my struggle with fear; and I never realized how perfect it actually fits with my fear of losing weight and fear of failure.... Wow, thank YOU. I love God's Word and it never ceases to amaze me how a verse which He's used over and over again in different areas of my life can suddenly come to life all over again and be applied to another area of my life. You are a God-send and I'm grateful for your encouragement! I'll follow you, too! :0)
Hi Kelli! Thanks for the encouragement! You are right; sometimes it's hard and sometimes it's a walk in the park, but we must keep going. I find the easy days are even hard to enjoy because I'm fearing the hard ones are around the corner... Time to break that cycle! I'll follow you, too! :0)
Hi Margene! Thanks for your note and for your support and encouragement! Isn't Deb simply amazing? I'm so grateful for her! I'll follow you and am looking forward to reading a sister's take on the life and journey God has set before her. Thank you for sharing it with us all!
.... wow... I'm so grateful. You four are part of that "great cloud of witnesses", though know the Bible is talking about people in heaven and others... but still - that's how I feel about the verse in this situation in my life and this blog. Thanks, gals!